Breaking the Glass Barrier

Dearest Appa.... You Always told me I can be whatever I want... I and ultimately did whatever I wanted.... with your words echoing in my head.... This post is dedicated to you.... I only wish more people could be like you..... 

The Indian Society has progressed considerably over the last century. The outlook of Indians has become considerably broader and things seem to be improving for the better. However patriarchy continues to be dominant in India. Though families are becoming increasingly liberal, the society in general continues to be chauvinistic.

An interview of one of the accused in the infamous Nirbhaya Case only echos the sentiments expressed by several men in India who believe that women are born to serve men. Also, men believe that it is below their dignity to partake in household chores and feel that women are inferior mortals whose sole purpose on earth is to serve them.

Women in some societies are made to believe that they are inferior. In some societies they are made to believe that they are equal to men. They live with the belief that they can do what they want and aim for the ceiling only to be hit hard on the head by the invisible glass barrier of patriarchy that injures their personality. Some brush the injury away and break the glass paving for a barrier less path for other while some recoil post hitting the glass. My tale is one where I hit the glass and decided to shy away from it, yet climbed over the glass barrier by circumventing it (by leaving the country). I bow down to all the strong women who had the courage and will power to break the barrier.

I belong to an extremely liberal family. My family took my education and empowerment very seriously. When I decided that I wanted to pursue Mechanical Engineering, my parents wholeheartedly supported me. I completely loved my course but was inherently depressed and unhappy as several of my batch mates treated me like an untouchable. I was made to sit alone on the left side first bench. The bench that was meant to seat five students, had only two students seated on it as my classmates were vehemently against the idea of sitting near someone they considered inferior just because their set of 46 chromosomes had one different chromosome as compared to mine. 

The disparity and discrimination did not end with the seating arrangement. When the class decided to go on an industrial visit, the other girl in my class and I expressed our desire to join them. However some of my classmates purposely did not book tickets for us, under the pretext of in-availability of tickets as they did not want a lesser mortal joining them on the trip. 

Symposiums and tech-fests are meant to be events where people share their ideas. However in my department for the girls it was far from what it was meant to be. We had to draw rangolis to welcome the chief guests and decorate the stage as the so called superior mortals (the boys or the men in my class) refused to help us.

My irritation and annoyance at the disparity grew so much that I really wanted to get out of the university as soon as possible and head out of the city as soon as I could. The mere sight of my college brought tears to my eyes. The day I left my city I felt a sense of empowerment. I could be myself and people respected me for the person I am. Not for the gender I belonged to. The men in my life who supported me then continue to support me now and I am thankful to all the people in my life (men and women) for making me what I am now.My heart goes out to all the women who face supression and discrimination at home and in the society.

I do not mean to say that all men are evil or mean. But the percentage of people that need to really understand that their right to be be liberal should not curtail the freedom of others is very high. A vast majority of my classmates were chauvinistic, Some were extremely broadminded and humane. My sincere thanks to them for reinforcing my faith in humanity and for giving me the belief that good people exist. I see shining examples of liberal and strong men in my grand father, father,brother and friends and wish that other men can stop being chauvinistic and hypocritical. Maybe once they have a daughter or wife their stance may change. Only time can tell what changes may occur in the future. Until then I pray.... Into this heaven of Freedom my People.... Let my Country Awake!!!

P.S: This post is not intended to hurt anyone. The primary aim of this post is to make people aware of the restrictions the society imposes on us. Also, Over my four years in college I had several nightmares and wanted to bring it to an end. Documenting it and bringing it to an end puts some sort of closure on my emotions.